Friday, 22 September 2017

The Diary of Miss Darcy Bustle: 22 September

The Lady’s lovable office dog tells all

Written by Miss Darcy Bustle
A new dog has moved in four doors down called Fifi. She's a black miniature poodle who seems a bit stand-offish and who doesn't seem that keen to make friends. Duffle and I have dashed out several times as she's strolled past and given her a really good sniff but all she did was turn her nose up at us. Where are her manners? 
I may have to write to Thomas Blaikie. Her owners have suggested that perhaps I should make more of an effort and learn French. Or perhaps not, I say.

This morning I received a letter from a reader telling me that Molly, her bichon frise, always refused to go swimming. She had seen my holiday snaps and could see that 
I was a great swimmer. Did I have any advice? Naturally I wrote back to her straight away and said I was flattered but was it really important that Molly learnt to swim ? 
Could she not learn to do something else ? Like tap dancing perhaps or become a magician's assistant? Rabbits can't 
be the only stars.

PeterAndre2Peter Andre- and friend

That lovely man Peter Andre has written to say that he wants me to encourage all my doggie friends to join in with him next month for his My Big Walkies campaign for the RSPCA. The plan is to do 10,000 steps a day. Is that even possible Peter? Have you seen the size of my legs? He also wants humans to sing to dogs more – it can be therapeutic apparently. It's good for human lungs and gives dogs a sense of connection, rather like having a vocal hug. Well, we'll be the judge of that.

When I opened my wardrobe this morning I discovered I had nothing to wear. The two gorgeous knits from Kath Knits have been eaten by the moths and I seem to have grown a little and can't fit into my waterproof vest. What is to be done? I can't bear the cold weather.

As if in answer to my prayers for a new wardrobe, London Fashion Week opened with a ready-to-wear collection for dogs by designers Sniffie. The woman responsible, Caroline Roberts, said it was time that dogwear was giving an uplift. The idea is to create clothing ranges using exquisite fabrics and prints from expert craftsmen. Basically, treating doggy wear with the same respect as humans.
The models looked gorgeous, Pomeranians, whippets and French bulldogs were all strutting their stuff. The only thing missing was me on the front row... was my invitation in the post boys??

See you next week Instagram @missdarcybustle

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