Friday, 17 March 2017

The Diary of Miss Darcy Bustle: 17 March

Written by Miss Darcy Bustle
Monday
This morning, I went to the gardens near my house and joined the dog yoga group. I’m not sure that yoga is really for me, but the owners seemed to have a good time. They performed star-shape stretches on the grass while I ended up flat on my back with a rather frisky young pup trying to show me how to do the downward dog.

Tuesday
Kath has designed and knitted me a stunning new coat that is so beautiful people have stopped me in the street and taken photos of it. Two women have asked for the pattern, but there isn’t one because Kath knitted it ‘freeform’ she says. The buttons are little miniature versions of me which are so beautiful that I haven’t even tried to chew them. I am dropping hints to see if she can do me a blue version. I don’t think she has much on at the moment.

FullSizeRender1New coat by Kath Knits

Wednesday
I discovered today that Duffle has been secretly going out for brunch while I go to work. He’s supposed to go to work as well, in the gallery, with the editor’s husband, but they seem to spend a lot of time not working in the gallery. This morning, I stayed at home, and so they had to take me along. We were only at work for a few minutes before we headed off to a swanky brasserie called Bellanger where dogs are not only welcome but are even given special biscuits. I wonder if it’s too late to swap my career choices?

Thursday
Today there was a little tea party for Dorinda’s birthday – it’s a special one that ladies sometimes don’t like to talk about but in dog years she would be almost six. There were cakes and crisps and probably sausage rolls but I don’t know because I was banned. The editor said, after the peanuts last week, she couldn’t risk it. I promised I wouldn’t do my little starving face and persuade Andrea to give me a plate of treats, but she didn’t believe me. As if i would fib. I will be having my own birthday party on 25 March (my first) and she won’t be able to ban me from that, surely? Lyra the Labrador wrote and said that for her birthday she was given a run around on the beach and a celebration tea of cooked small cocktail sausages. I have left her letter lying around.

Friday
I watched Crufts this week in the hope of being able to pick up some tips. I know that I could never be entered because my legs are not perfect enough and I have sticky-up mohican hair on my neck. But I can dream. And even if I can’t enter, I could at least be given one of those lovely pink bows that the judges don’t seem to like. Why should Yorkies have all the fun?

See you next week! Instagram @missdarcybustle


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